Friday, June 11, 2010

You're So Liberal If...

Every year, our local paper, The Nashville Scene runs a fantastically funny spoof on our city where locals send in their recommendations to complete the sentence: "You're so Nashville if..."  Got me to thinking - how would you complete the sentence with a slightly different subject.  Herewith my first installment of "You're so Liberal if..." ;  please post or e-mail me your suggestions:

1. still think George W. Bush is to blame for the BP oil spill.

2. believe that Obama is the second coming of Christ.  (This is particularly difficult, because you don't believe in Christ anyway.)

3. think Sunday-Go-to-Meeting Baptists are a greater threat to the country than radical Muslims.

4. believe that government is the only entity that can create jobs, because businesses are nothing but greedy and evil.

5. know that SUV's kill people, not their drivers.  (guns, shooters - same thing)

6. believe that American automobiles are a greater threat to the environment than erupting volcanoes in Iceland.

7. want the same people that can't spell your name right on your driver's license to be in charge of dispensing your medication.

8. want guns taken away from law abiding Americans but are cool with Iran getting the nuclear bomb.

9. believe that a murder committed as a "hate crime" should  receive a stiffer sentence than the death penalty you oppose for a regular murder.

10. believe that saying "one nation, under God," should be expunged from the public schools but that reading a Koran there is a cultural improvement.

Well, there's a starting ten.

No comments: